RELATIONSHIP STUFF
FOUR WAYS TO MAKE MARRIED SEX BETTER
Most people expect their sex lives to fade after they get married, but it doesn't HAVE to be that way. With some effort from both of you, you can keep it fresh.
Here are four tips for having better sex once you're married.
1. USE SEX TO GET PAST RUTS IN YOUR MARRIAGE
There are going to be times in your marriage when careers, kids, and other important stuff pack your schedule and get in the way of your relationship.
But even during those ruts, you can't forget about sex. You just have to use the little time you DO have together wisely. And by that I mean, get NASTY whenever you have the chance.
2. STOP LOOKING AT EACH OTHER AS HUSBAND AND WIFE
It might sound a little harsh, but when you're getting busy, it helps to stop thinking of each other as husband and wife, or as the mother and father of your children.
If you want to put a new spin on a tired bedroom routine, you have to be willing to fantasize and to let your filthy imaginations run wild.
3. KEEP UP YOUR APPEARANCE
People tend to let themselves go when they get married, and there are a ton of reasons why. But aside from the health problems it can cause, there's your sex life to think about. Because if you don't take an interest in taking care of yourself, the person you're boning might stop taking an interest in YOU.
So do whatever you can to maintain your looks and it doesn't hurt to wear something sexy to bed every now and then.
4. MAKE YOUR ROOM A NO-KID ZONE
This one's simple: If your kids know that your bedroom's off-limits, that means more space and time for you to be alone, to practice some healthy, consensual
fornication.
(Ask Men)
SIGNS YOU SHOULDN'T GET BACK TOGETHER WITH YOUR EX
People break-up and get back together all the time, because it's easy to slip back into the same old routine. But it's usually a bad idea. So if you're thinking of reuniting with an ex, here are five red flags to look out for . . .
1. THE QUIRKS AREN'T ADORABLE ANYMORE, THEY'RE ANNOYING.
And if they're annoying NOW, just imagine how annoying they'll be in five or ten YEARS.
2. YOU'VE ALREADY STARTED TO MOVE ON.
Moving on is tough, and if you get back together, then break up, you'll have to start all over again. Keep in mind that most couples who get back together eventually break up again.
3. YOU STILL FIGHT OVER THE SAME STUFF.
If you get back together and you haven't solved any problems, then the chances you'll break up again are right around 100%.
4. THERE'S ONE MAIN ISSUE YOU CAN'T GET PAST.
If you're religious and she's not, or she still wants kids and you don't, it's time to just end it. Those are things you might NEVER agree on.
5. YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY WON'T RESPECT YOU.
When you broke up, you probably told them about all the horrible things the other person did. And it probably made them MAD. So if you suddenly decide to take the person BACK, you'll lose your friends' respect. That's why you shouldn't badmouth your significant other to your friends and family until you're absolutely sure you're breaking up for good.
(The Frisky)
TIPS FOR THE SECOND DATE
Everyone always stresses about getting the first date out of the way. But assuming you don't blow it, you also need a plan for date number two.
Here are four tips from "Cosmo" on what to do during the SECOND date . . .
1. BE SEXIER
For the first date, you might have kept your outfit simple and casual. For date number two, you'll want to wear something a little sexier to keep his attention.
2. TELL HIM MORE ABOUT YOURSELF - BUT NOT TOO MUCH
It's fine to tell him about the things you like, the things you don't like, and a couple crazy adventures you've had. But the second date is NOT the time to spill a ton of personal info.
3. TOUCH HIM FLIRTATIOUSLY
If you make a few playful gestures, like touching his arm, it'll let
him know that you feel comfortable. And once he knows you're having a good time, he'll relax too.
4. LEAVE HIM WANTING MORE
If you're really interested in a guy, don't hook up on the second
date. It's fine to flirt, but end the night with just a kiss: It'll pretty much guarantee a third date.
What A Guy's THING Says About His Personality
A man's genitals aren't just another part of his body - They're an extension of who he is.
With that in mind, here's a rundown explaining what a guy's privates say about his personality, according to a website called TheFrisky.com.
Small junk:
Guys with small genitals are more likely to excel at every other aspect of life, because they're motivated to make up for what they lack "down there."
They strive to be successful in their careers, and to be better lovers. In spite of their shortcomings, they aim to please.
Massive junk:
Guys who have something to be proud of in their pants don't aim to please as much, because they just don't have to.
They're less motivated to be successful at work, and are more likely to lie back and let the woman do all the work in bed. After all, he's doing HER a favour, right?
"Average" junk:
This one's a toss-up. You can never really tell what you're going to get with an average-sized guy.
Girth but no length:
These guys tend to be pushy and aggressive, because they've only got part of the package. They have big personalities, and will probably tell you ahead of time what to expect out of sex with them.
Oddly-shaped junk:
Just like their genitals, guys with unusual or bizarre-looking members tend to be eccentrics. They're also more likely to be complete freaks between the sheets.
PAY SOMEONE ELSE TO DUMP YOUR PARTNER!
35-year-old guy named Bradley Laborman started a new business called IDUMP4U.com. People pay Bradley $10 to call their boyfriend or girlfriend and end the relationship on their behalf. Then he posts the "best" breakup calls on his website.
He says his clients are mostly Uni students, and mostly women dumping guys. He also says he'll do your dirty work for you even if you're in the wrong, because then he's just highlighting how much of an idiot you are for using his service.
http://idump.bradman.tv/
7 TIPS FOR BREAKING UP WITH SOMEONE
So you want to break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend but you're just not sure how to do it. Here are seven tips on how to break it off with someone:
1. MAKE THEM THE FIRST TO KNOW
Out of respect, never tell your friends you're going to break up with someone BEFORE telling your boyfriend or girlfriend it's over.
2. FIND A NEUTRAL ZONE
Try to find a neutral location where both of you will be comfortable expressing your feelings. A park is great because you can walk and talk, or find a more secluded
spot if you think someone's going to cry - or scream at you.
3. END IT IN PERSON
No matter how much it sucks, it's always better to break up with someone face-to-face. That means never doing it over text, email, or the phone.
4. KEEP IT SIMPLE
There's no need to put anyone through a lengthy list of all the reasons why you can't stand to be with them anymore. If you care about someone at all, they deserve an
explanation, but save them the long-winded reasons behind exactly why and how things went sour.
It's also important to let them know that the decision to split up is difficult for you too. Just don't make promises you have no intensions of keeping . . . like saying you're going to call if you know you're not going to.
5. GET THEM TO SEE YOUR POINT OF VIEW
In all likelihood, you're not the only one that's felt the relationship going downhill.
Ask them if they've been feeling it too. They'll probably have a few examples about why things haven't been working out. Letting them talk it through will help them see why you brought the topic up in the first place.
6. BE READY FOR TEARS
For the guys, prepare yourselves . . . because chances are, tears will be shed. Ending a relationship can bring intense emotion and she's not about to save you from seeing it all pour out at once.
If she DOES start to cry, be sympathetic, but don't be drawn in by the overflow of emotion. Set up some plans with friends later that day so the breakup process doesn't get dragged out, and so you're not alone if you feel bad about what just happened.
7. DON'T CHANGE YOUR MIND
There's a big reason why you made the decision to end your relationship. They may argue, or cry, or "not understand," but stick to your guns no matter what.
(Ask Men)